Date 3 in the trifecta of a busy week was with San Diego. Given his name he obviously had to drive up from San Diego to see me. So when he suggested we get together at 6 I happily obliged. I figured we'd be done by 9 and he'd drive back to San Diego. Little did I know....
We met up at a bar on Ocean Ave. in Santa Monica. He was very handsome, nicely built, as tall as he had said in his profile, and didn't even give me a hard time for being embarrassingly late. (I know. Rude.) Conversation flowed as freely as the wine and it was light and delicious, much like the Sauvignon Blanc he had so kindly called me to ask if I would like him to order prior to my arrival.
After an hour or so he suggested we go someplace for dinner. We wandered down 3rd Street Promenade til we found an Italian place that served gnocchi, my favorite! As we were sitting down to dinner he mentioned he had some friends he'd like us to meet up with later. Their dinner reservation wasn't til 8. Which would mean we would be meeting them around 10 or so. It was now 7:30 and we were running out of the usual first date topics to talk about. Pass the wine....
If I talked about every detail of this date we'd be here all day. Dinner was fine, and having had 2 glasses of wine, I kissed him. He was a good kisser and smelled delicious. We met his friends at another bar around 11pm and dropped them off at home around midnight. By this time I had yawned numerous times throughout the evening and was relieved that it was finally time to go home.
He had other things in mind. He wanted to keep hanging out and talk. Ugh. But I always enjoy a good drive on the PCH and we were right there, so why not? We pulled over to look at the ocean, one thing led to another, and next thing you know we're necking like 2 teenagers on prom night.
We had been kissing for a few minutes when suddenly a bright light was shined into the car. Yes, the cops! WE JUST GOT BUSTED FOR PARKING! I could NOT stop laughing as the officer told us to move along. What am I, 16?! Fortunately we were both fully clothed, unlike the very unattractive fat man we saw get out of the backseat of the mini van in front of us. Ick. Nast.
By this time it was 1am and I finally asked for mercy. I could think of nothing but my comfy warm bed and though I was having a good enough time, sleep sounded even better. That should've been my first indication of whether I should see this guy again or not.
He said he wanted to come see me next weekend and I was too tired to argue, plus mildly interested. So I said yes. He's going to Vegas with his boys and then driving to see me. I think this makes absolutely no sense, but I'm a woman with a sense of direction, so what do I know?
I like him enough but do I LIKE him like him? Or am I just too in lust with Crikey to give this guy a fair shot? I suppose only time will tell but my gut is telling me this is probably not the best match for me.
Every time you date someone with an issue that you have to work to ignore, you're settling,
LL
P.S. - Another sign I probably shouldn't see this guy again? I texted Crikey during one of my bathroom breaks. Yes, I'll see you in hell.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
*Swoon*
Thanks to the flurry of dating activity that was being planned last week, it was less of a struggle to text Crikey than I thought it would be. Having learned my lesson from Crossfit and not wanting to screw it up with Crikey so early on was extra incentive NOT to act on all the flirty feelings.
Friday morning, (this is the Friday after my date with The Actor for those who are following along chronologically) as I was coming home from the gym at 8 o'clock in the morning my phone beeped. I assumed it was my roommate updating me on the bathroom/eating status of our dogs.
Much to my amazement, it was Crikey!!! Color me shocked!! And pleased. And intrigued. And turned on....oops, where was I?
It had been pouring rain and flooding in California since Crikey had left for Germany. So this is what he said:
"What the hell is going on back there? I leave you for 10 minutes and the heavens open!! Or it could be the angels crying cause they know how much I miss you..."
(I'll give you a second to regain control of your gag reflex.)
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!! I mean....just....AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! Sweetest. Text. Ever. Seriously!!!
OK OK OK. I know it's nauseating. As a friend pointed out to me, I MUST be nuts for this guy because that is a barfy text message....and I LOVE IT.
Rain be damned, nothing could take the smile off my face that day!
Flirting is the art of making a man feel pleased with himself,
LL
Friday morning, (this is the Friday after my date with The Actor for those who are following along chronologically) as I was coming home from the gym at 8 o'clock in the morning my phone beeped. I assumed it was my roommate updating me on the bathroom/eating status of our dogs.
Much to my amazement, it was Crikey!!! Color me shocked!! And pleased. And intrigued. And turned on....oops, where was I?
It had been pouring rain and flooding in California since Crikey had left for Germany. So this is what he said:
"What the hell is going on back there? I leave you for 10 minutes and the heavens open!! Or it could be the angels crying cause they know how much I miss you..."
(I'll give you a second to regain control of your gag reflex.)
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!! I mean....just....AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! Sweetest. Text. Ever. Seriously!!!
OK OK OK. I know it's nauseating. As a friend pointed out to me, I MUST be nuts for this guy because that is a barfy text message....and I LOVE IT.
Rain be damned, nothing could take the smile off my face that day!
Flirting is the art of making a man feel pleased with himself,
LL
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
The Actor
Actor & my emails have been quite amusing and sarcastic, it's clear this guy shares my sense of humor, which is a key trait for me. It ALMOST makes up for the fact that, as as I suspected, he is an actor.
But wait, he's not just any actor. I actually know this guy's career! He was the host of a show on HGTV that I used to love. As did my mother. So of course as soon as he tells me his name I email my mom squealing about who I'm going on a date with. Even if I had zero interest in the guy I'd have to go out with him just to let my mom live vicariously through my F-list celebrity dating stories.
This kind of puts the Actor at a double disadvantage right out of the gate: 1. my mom's a fan which doesn't exactly scream cool, and 2. he's my first date after falling madly in lust with Crikey. But I make my best effort to forget both of these facts and give the guy a fair shot.
We meet up at a pub-esque bar in Hollywood. Shockingly, I am the first to arrive. (this NEVER happens, I AM a woman after all) He calls me to find out where exactly it is and in a few minutes pulls up in front in his classic thunderbird. I guess this would qualify as impressive if I knew anything about cars, but alas, I don't. I hop in to go find parking with him and only after the rickety door shuts do I realize how stupid of an idea that was. He now has an all access pass to drive me to some remote ravine where he will rape and bury my body. Awesome.
Fortunately, life decides not to imitate a bad Lifetime movie and we simply find parking. An anticlimactic end to the scenarios I was running in my head, but one that I am grateful for. As we're getting out of the car he tells me I have a nice ass. I'm not sure how I feel about this because I DO work my butt off to keep it in good shape but really? I've known you ten minutes.
It's a bit weird being on a date with this guy I used to watch at least once a week on my tivo. When he says things I hear it in his "tv voice" instead of as just a dude. He looks exactly like he did on TV, though somehow on television he seemed taller than he actually is. Ah, Hollywood.
The bar is totally appropriate for his retro, laid back style, which is why I picked it. The food is DELICIOUS as is the beer selection. Though Actor decides it's funny to mock me when I order mozzarella balls. Really, what am I, 15?
The conversation is good and he actually asks me a lot of questions about myself which, if you know actors, can sometimes come as a surprise. He DOES seem to have a bit of angry actor syndrome because he has been on some successful shows and is currently struggling to find his next deal. This is one of those things I'll have to learn to live with if I ever want to have a relationship with this guy and it's why I don't date actors. I hear this stuff at work all day so to talk about it outside of the office can get a bit exhausting. Luckily, this is our first date and any decision of this nature is months, hell maybe years, away! (Hey. I'm a slow mover. What can I say?)
After a few hours and a few beers we're both ready to call it a night. I once again fold my very tall body into his very small car (another reason I don't get the appeal of classic cars) as he politely offers to drive me to where I had parked. The made for TV movie about my life and death momentarily flashes before me again but I'm pretty sure this guy is harmless.
When we get to my car he gets out to say goodbye. He is looking at the front end of my car which happens to be a bit dented and says he could easily fix it. Oh REALLY? I've been tired of driving around looking a bit busted but would rather spend my money on expensive jeans so I've done nothing about this. But if I could get a dude to do it for FREE?
Wait a second. What does he mean by free? Are we talking FREE or are we talking "in exchange for sexual favors so since no money is exchanged it's technically free" free? He's a man. I think I just answered my own question.
I kiss him goodnight, partly because I like him, partly because in my geeky mind it would be cool to make out with a TV personality I am a fan of, and partly because I've had 3 beers.
And scene,
LL
But wait, he's not just any actor. I actually know this guy's career! He was the host of a show on HGTV that I used to love. As did my mother. So of course as soon as he tells me his name I email my mom squealing about who I'm going on a date with. Even if I had zero interest in the guy I'd have to go out with him just to let my mom live vicariously through my F-list celebrity dating stories.
This kind of puts the Actor at a double disadvantage right out of the gate: 1. my mom's a fan which doesn't exactly scream cool, and 2. he's my first date after falling madly in lust with Crikey. But I make my best effort to forget both of these facts and give the guy a fair shot.
We meet up at a pub-esque bar in Hollywood. Shockingly, I am the first to arrive. (this NEVER happens, I AM a woman after all) He calls me to find out where exactly it is and in a few minutes pulls up in front in his classic thunderbird. I guess this would qualify as impressive if I knew anything about cars, but alas, I don't. I hop in to go find parking with him and only after the rickety door shuts do I realize how stupid of an idea that was. He now has an all access pass to drive me to some remote ravine where he will rape and bury my body. Awesome.
Fortunately, life decides not to imitate a bad Lifetime movie and we simply find parking. An anticlimactic end to the scenarios I was running in my head, but one that I am grateful for. As we're getting out of the car he tells me I have a nice ass. I'm not sure how I feel about this because I DO work my butt off to keep it in good shape but really? I've known you ten minutes.
It's a bit weird being on a date with this guy I used to watch at least once a week on my tivo. When he says things I hear it in his "tv voice" instead of as just a dude. He looks exactly like he did on TV, though somehow on television he seemed taller than he actually is. Ah, Hollywood.
The bar is totally appropriate for his retro, laid back style, which is why I picked it. The food is DELICIOUS as is the beer selection. Though Actor decides it's funny to mock me when I order mozzarella balls. Really, what am I, 15?
The conversation is good and he actually asks me a lot of questions about myself which, if you know actors, can sometimes come as a surprise. He DOES seem to have a bit of angry actor syndrome because he has been on some successful shows and is currently struggling to find his next deal. This is one of those things I'll have to learn to live with if I ever want to have a relationship with this guy and it's why I don't date actors. I hear this stuff at work all day so to talk about it outside of the office can get a bit exhausting. Luckily, this is our first date and any decision of this nature is months, hell maybe years, away! (Hey. I'm a slow mover. What can I say?)
After a few hours and a few beers we're both ready to call it a night. I once again fold my very tall body into his very small car (another reason I don't get the appeal of classic cars) as he politely offers to drive me to where I had parked. The made for TV movie about my life and death momentarily flashes before me again but I'm pretty sure this guy is harmless.
When we get to my car he gets out to say goodbye. He is looking at the front end of my car which happens to be a bit dented and says he could easily fix it. Oh REALLY? I've been tired of driving around looking a bit busted but would rather spend my money on expensive jeans so I've done nothing about this. But if I could get a dude to do it for FREE?
Wait a second. What does he mean by free? Are we talking FREE or are we talking "in exchange for sexual favors so since no money is exchanged it's technically free" free? He's a man. I think I just answered my own question.
I kiss him goodnight, partly because I like him, partly because in my geeky mind it would be cool to make out with a TV personality I am a fan of, and partly because I've had 3 beers.
And scene,
LL
Monday, January 25, 2010
We meet at last.
Funnily enough, while I was on the date with OB who should happen to call me but the man who is fast becoming my best imaginary friend: Crikey. He left a joking message about how he would accept my apology for being out of contact for so long and that he still wants to meet me. Continuing along with our sarcastic banter I sent him a text later that night telling him he's lost his South African mind if he thinks I'm apologizing for anything since HE was the one who had told me he'd get in touch when he got back in town from the holidays. More flirty words were exchanged but as usual, we left it with no firm plans.
So last weekend I decided to grab the bull by the horns and call his bluff. My friend from home was visiting and having shown her my favorite gay bars during her previous visits, we decided to venture out to a *gasp* straight bar! I was feeling particularly cute and skinny as we headed out so I decided to tell Crikey to come meet us so that on the off chance that he actually DID show up, I would be guaranteed to put my good hair day and cleavage baring shirt to use.
An hour or two went by and no word from him, which was no shock to me. I had my phone on the bar because my roommate was also going to be joining us and around 8 or so it started ringing. I expected it to be my roommate but lo and behold it was Crikey! He had just gotten off of work and said he would come and meet us. I said I'd believe it when I saw it.
I had texted my roommate to tell her to hurry up and get her butt to the bar because Crikey might actually make an appearance and about an hour later, she arrived. The first thing she said to me was, "If Crikey was the guy holding the door open for me, and I think he was, he's HOT." Oooh goody!
Sure enough my phone rang and then I turned to see him walking into the bar. His profile pictures did not do him justice. Standing in front of me was 6 feet and 3 inches of chiseled, muscular, gorgeous MAN. Thank god I had had a glass of wine or I might not have had the guts to identify myself to him. Though...given my own height I doubt I could've hid for long.
He walked over and hugged me and he smelled DELICIOUS. Danger zone. I knew instantly that this guy was going to become the new front runner in my own personal man marathon. He also had the look of a dude who could have any girl he wanted and thus, the chances of him being a major douchebag were high.
Unfortunately for me....well fortunately but unfortunately for my heart....he was anything but. He was a gentleman in every sense of the word: involving my friends in conversation, buying drinks for us all, but paying extra attention to me to let me know I was the one he was there to see. The thing I liked best about him were his eyes. He has some of the kindest eyes I've ever seen on a man. Something about the laugh lines around them and the way he would listen intently when I was talking to him melted my heart.
This was trouble. Big trouble.
After a few more glasses of wine, he and I were chatting with our heads closely together. I, being the happy go lucky and slutty wino that I am, leaned in and kissed him. It was as delicious as he smelled. After a few moments he murmured, "Should we be doing this in front of your friends?" and I said "I don't care if we should or not," and kissed him again. Some friend I am.
The rest of the evening went on swimmingly and I was planning the multiple dates we'd be going on in the coming week if I had my way. Then he told me he was leaving for Germany on Monday for 3 weeks to guard the bodies of the celebrity couple he works for. As quick as the universe gives, it takes away.
He walked me to my car, told me to put him as my number one on speed dial in case I had problems on the way home, and kissed me goodbye, promising to call or text me from Germany. I LOVE when a guy gets all protective so this was a major turn on. If I hadn't been driving I would've sat on my hands to keep from texting him immediately. But, having learned my lesson from Crossfit, I decided to proceed with caution in the hopes of not screwing this up.
A little while after we got home he texted me goodnight, which I was happy *I* had not initiated. I went to sleep with a smile on my face and woke up thinking of him.
Here's where it gets tough. Every hormone in my body wants to text him and begin flirting again. But I am remembering the wise words of Crossfit and I am NOT making the next move. This time I'll make the man come to me!
I just hope he comes soon.
No pun intended.
(OK maybe a bit of a pun intended...)
There are easier things in life than trying to find a nice guy, like nailing jelly to a tree for example,
LL
So last weekend I decided to grab the bull by the horns and call his bluff. My friend from home was visiting and having shown her my favorite gay bars during her previous visits, we decided to venture out to a *gasp* straight bar! I was feeling particularly cute and skinny as we headed out so I decided to tell Crikey to come meet us so that on the off chance that he actually DID show up, I would be guaranteed to put my good hair day and cleavage baring shirt to use.
An hour or two went by and no word from him, which was no shock to me. I had my phone on the bar because my roommate was also going to be joining us and around 8 or so it started ringing. I expected it to be my roommate but lo and behold it was Crikey! He had just gotten off of work and said he would come and meet us. I said I'd believe it when I saw it.
I had texted my roommate to tell her to hurry up and get her butt to the bar because Crikey might actually make an appearance and about an hour later, she arrived. The first thing she said to me was, "If Crikey was the guy holding the door open for me, and I think he was, he's HOT." Oooh goody!
Sure enough my phone rang and then I turned to see him walking into the bar. His profile pictures did not do him justice. Standing in front of me was 6 feet and 3 inches of chiseled, muscular, gorgeous MAN. Thank god I had had a glass of wine or I might not have had the guts to identify myself to him. Though...given my own height I doubt I could've hid for long.
He walked over and hugged me and he smelled DELICIOUS. Danger zone. I knew instantly that this guy was going to become the new front runner in my own personal man marathon. He also had the look of a dude who could have any girl he wanted and thus, the chances of him being a major douchebag were high.
Unfortunately for me....well fortunately but unfortunately for my heart....he was anything but. He was a gentleman in every sense of the word: involving my friends in conversation, buying drinks for us all, but paying extra attention to me to let me know I was the one he was there to see. The thing I liked best about him were his eyes. He has some of the kindest eyes I've ever seen on a man. Something about the laugh lines around them and the way he would listen intently when I was talking to him melted my heart.
This was trouble. Big trouble.
After a few more glasses of wine, he and I were chatting with our heads closely together. I, being the happy go lucky and slutty wino that I am, leaned in and kissed him. It was as delicious as he smelled. After a few moments he murmured, "Should we be doing this in front of your friends?" and I said "I don't care if we should or not," and kissed him again. Some friend I am.
The rest of the evening went on swimmingly and I was planning the multiple dates we'd be going on in the coming week if I had my way. Then he told me he was leaving for Germany on Monday for 3 weeks to guard the bodies of the celebrity couple he works for. As quick as the universe gives, it takes away.
He walked me to my car, told me to put him as my number one on speed dial in case I had problems on the way home, and kissed me goodbye, promising to call or text me from Germany. I LOVE when a guy gets all protective so this was a major turn on. If I hadn't been driving I would've sat on my hands to keep from texting him immediately. But, having learned my lesson from Crossfit, I decided to proceed with caution in the hopes of not screwing this up.
A little while after we got home he texted me goodnight, which I was happy *I* had not initiated. I went to sleep with a smile on my face and woke up thinking of him.
Here's where it gets tough. Every hormone in my body wants to text him and begin flirting again. But I am remembering the wise words of Crossfit and I am NOT making the next move. This time I'll make the man come to me!
I just hope he comes soon.
No pun intended.
(OK maybe a bit of a pun intended...)
There are easier things in life than trying to find a nice guy, like nailing jelly to a tree for example,
LL
Sunday, January 24, 2010
You down with the OB? Yeah you know me!
The date that I select as the opening ceremony for Round 2 is with Old Balls. (Whom from here on out I will refer to as OB just because I feel like such a jerk calling him Old Balls.) After exchanging an appropriate amount of emails he politely asked me for my number. We chat on the phone and make plans for later in the week. The morning of our date he texts me to reconfirm and tell me he's looking forward to it. I am a sucker for good manners so I am looking forward to the evening.
He picked a classy hotel bar that was 30 seconds from my house, which was kind of him since he lives in the valley, a good 20 minutes away. Again with the manners. He looked like his profile picture...for the most part. No, really, he did, but he also LOOKED more OB than I had perceived him as in his pics. Not like he was sprouting hair from his ears and had wrinkles like a shar pei...but there was just an air of "his forties" that he had to him. I felt like I was hanging out with a friend of my parents.
Conversation was pleasant, he didn't excessively drink, he complimented me and asked me questions about myself, he was interesting...but that click just wasn't there. I wish it was, because on paper he's perfect. He's successful, has 2 dogs, a house, a seemingly well balanced life of work and play...but if the click's not there, it's just not there.
I am a firm believer that the click CAN grow...but I also don't think the gentlemen doing online dating are looking for months of getting to know a girl before physical contact. When I meet someone considerably older than me in my daily life and we have regular interaction and THEN a relationship grows from that, that's one thing. But trying to build all of that from someone who's online looking for someone to date, not just be friends with, is a bit trickier.
He was kind enough to drive me home since my roommate had dropped me off at the hotel, and I didn't fear him as the stalker type so I felt ok letting him know where I live. He swooped in for a quick peck, which was, once again, the appropriate gentlemanly thing to do. He texted me when he got home and emailed me the next day. It oddly didn't feel like overkill, just courteous. I haven't quite figured out how to tell him I'm just not that into him. He's the first guy I had a date with who clearly didn't feel the same lack of click that I did. I don't want to hurt his feelings because he is a very sweet and good man....just not the right sweet and good man for me.
I'm just not that into him,
LL
He picked a classy hotel bar that was 30 seconds from my house, which was kind of him since he lives in the valley, a good 20 minutes away. Again with the manners. He looked like his profile picture...for the most part. No, really, he did, but he also LOOKED more OB than I had perceived him as in his pics. Not like he was sprouting hair from his ears and had wrinkles like a shar pei...but there was just an air of "his forties" that he had to him. I felt like I was hanging out with a friend of my parents.
Conversation was pleasant, he didn't excessively drink, he complimented me and asked me questions about myself, he was interesting...but that click just wasn't there. I wish it was, because on paper he's perfect. He's successful, has 2 dogs, a house, a seemingly well balanced life of work and play...but if the click's not there, it's just not there.
I am a firm believer that the click CAN grow...but I also don't think the gentlemen doing online dating are looking for months of getting to know a girl before physical contact. When I meet someone considerably older than me in my daily life and we have regular interaction and THEN a relationship grows from that, that's one thing. But trying to build all of that from someone who's online looking for someone to date, not just be friends with, is a bit trickier.
He was kind enough to drive me home since my roommate had dropped me off at the hotel, and I didn't fear him as the stalker type so I felt ok letting him know where I live. He swooped in for a quick peck, which was, once again, the appropriate gentlemanly thing to do. He texted me when he got home and emailed me the next day. It oddly didn't feel like overkill, just courteous. I haven't quite figured out how to tell him I'm just not that into him. He's the first guy I had a date with who clearly didn't feel the same lack of click that I did. I don't want to hurt his feelings because he is a very sweet and good man....just not the right sweet and good man for me.
I'm just not that into him,
LL
Friday, January 22, 2010
The Contenders
So, who are these men folk who are trying to virtually charm my pants off? Let’s begin:
~ Professor: one of the first ones to email me. I’m hesitant about this one. He’s hot and has a great body, but he looks like a bit of a d-bag in his main pic. Very frat boy-esque. And then there’s the whole age thing. Since the past 2 idiots I’ve actually liked have both been 29 (so is he) and both gone weird on me, I’m beginning to think I was right when I was going after the old men. (Granted…I had something to do with weirding out the said 29 year olds.) He’s a high school teacher which doesn’t really speak to his being rich like I like ‘em but he’s not in “the biz” and yet has a steady job, which is somewhat of a rarity here in Hollywood. I read his profile aloud to my roommate. She deems him appropriate. I hem and haw and say I’m not sure but she insists I email him back. Fine. She wins.
~ Old Balls: this is a horrible name for a very nice man but my friend and I used it and it stuck, I can’t help it. He’s the one I had favorited in the first round and who had, in turn, ignored me. Awesome. But since I liked him the first time I guess it’s a good sign that he’s emailed me, right? He speaks a bit old school, calling me “m’lady” and such, but it’s not overdone. Plus he has 2 CUTE doggies and I am a sucker for those pics. I email him back.
~ The Actor: oh hell. I have promised myself NO ACTORS. But this one lists his income as significant and no where in his profile mentions that he is an actor (a wise move, sir). The only reason I suspect this as his profession is due to a headshot as one of the pictures he has posted. Hey, maybe he’s a real estate agent. They take cheesy headshots too, right? I winked at this guy the first round and he ignored me then but *surprise* thanks to the new profile, he responds to my wink with an email. This is starting to go to my head.
~ San Diego: I noticed this guy in my recommendations the site gives me. I think he is way too hot for me (wait! No! none of that! I am hot enough!) but am feeling rather brazen thanks to all the emails and winks I’m receiving so I agree with the site and say I’m interested. He’s a gorgeous, tall, well built black man. Coincidentally, this is usually “my type.” His profile is interesting too, albeit a little wordy. He’s 38 and makes a good living. Done and done. He sends me a very long email introducing himself which, being rather wordy myself, I am impressed as opposed to creeped out. He lives in San Diego but I love it there and it’s only 2 hours away. No big deal.
I have emailed with a few other guys but they either are emailing me back too slow or fail to keep my interest and as such, I lose them in the sea of emails in my inbox. Oops. Oh, and Crikey is still on the scene somehow. He’s on the back burner for the moment because he texted me the other day asking why I’ve got no love for him. Um, excuse me sir? YOU’RE the one who canceled on ME not once but TWICE. If your accent wasn’t so darn charming and your face not so darn attractive we probably wouldn’t even be having this conversation! But priorities first: time for me to give the new guys a shot before I start rearranging plans for the JV squad player.
Whenever I want a really nice meal, I start dating again,
LL
~ Professor: one of the first ones to email me. I’m hesitant about this one. He’s hot and has a great body, but he looks like a bit of a d-bag in his main pic. Very frat boy-esque. And then there’s the whole age thing. Since the past 2 idiots I’ve actually liked have both been 29 (so is he) and both gone weird on me, I’m beginning to think I was right when I was going after the old men. (Granted…I had something to do with weirding out the said 29 year olds.) He’s a high school teacher which doesn’t really speak to his being rich like I like ‘em but he’s not in “the biz” and yet has a steady job, which is somewhat of a rarity here in Hollywood. I read his profile aloud to my roommate. She deems him appropriate. I hem and haw and say I’m not sure but she insists I email him back. Fine. She wins.
~ Old Balls: this is a horrible name for a very nice man but my friend and I used it and it stuck, I can’t help it. He’s the one I had favorited in the first round and who had, in turn, ignored me. Awesome. But since I liked him the first time I guess it’s a good sign that he’s emailed me, right? He speaks a bit old school, calling me “m’lady” and such, but it’s not overdone. Plus he has 2 CUTE doggies and I am a sucker for those pics. I email him back.
~ The Actor: oh hell. I have promised myself NO ACTORS. But this one lists his income as significant and no where in his profile mentions that he is an actor (a wise move, sir). The only reason I suspect this as his profession is due to a headshot as one of the pictures he has posted. Hey, maybe he’s a real estate agent. They take cheesy headshots too, right? I winked at this guy the first round and he ignored me then but *surprise* thanks to the new profile, he responds to my wink with an email. This is starting to go to my head.
~ San Diego: I noticed this guy in my recommendations the site gives me. I think he is way too hot for me (wait! No! none of that! I am hot enough!) but am feeling rather brazen thanks to all the emails and winks I’m receiving so I agree with the site and say I’m interested. He’s a gorgeous, tall, well built black man. Coincidentally, this is usually “my type.” His profile is interesting too, albeit a little wordy. He’s 38 and makes a good living. Done and done. He sends me a very long email introducing himself which, being rather wordy myself, I am impressed as opposed to creeped out. He lives in San Diego but I love it there and it’s only 2 hours away. No big deal.
I have emailed with a few other guys but they either are emailing me back too slow or fail to keep my interest and as such, I lose them in the sea of emails in my inbox. Oops. Oh, and Crikey is still on the scene somehow. He’s on the back burner for the moment because he texted me the other day asking why I’ve got no love for him. Um, excuse me sir? YOU’RE the one who canceled on ME not once but TWICE. If your accent wasn’t so darn charming and your face not so darn attractive we probably wouldn’t even be having this conversation! But priorities first: time for me to give the new guys a shot before I start rearranging plans for the JV squad player.
Whenever I want a really nice meal, I start dating again,
LL
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Return of the Match
OK so it’s been awhile since I’ve blogged. Oops. But that’s because I’ve been so busy dating thanks to my new and improved profile that I’ve had zero time to myself! Good? Great!
New year meant time for a new profile. I figured there would be plenty of new faces too what with people getting all New Years Resolution-y on themselves. I had my roommate’s boyfriend help me choose pics, and had both my roomie and her boyfriend read over my new profile to help minimize the impression of crazy I’d be putting out in cyberspace. I changed my screen name too just to really commit to the idea of a new start. Off to the profile readers it went!
I expected some new activity to hit my account but what I got left me feeling like the most popular girl on the site!! Within hours of the new profile going up I had 5 or 6 winks and a few emails. One was even from a guy I had favorited the last go round who didn’t respond to me then but thanks to my new profile, here he was introducing himself and showering me with compliments.
OK so that was the first day. Activity is usually the heaviest the first day you put up a picture. (or in my case, a new picture) But here it is almost 3 weeks later and I’m STILL getting new interest on a daily basis! Color me shocked. At the height of the influx of activity I was talking to 6 different guys. Between last Saturday and this Saturday I’ll have gone out with 3 different men. Three men in seven days. This must be what Paris Hilton feels like. (Minus the burning sensation)
So stay tuned my friends because we have a lot of ground to cover….and a lot of love to make.
I’ve been on so many blind dates I should get a free dog,
LL
New year meant time for a new profile. I figured there would be plenty of new faces too what with people getting all New Years Resolution-y on themselves. I had my roommate’s boyfriend help me choose pics, and had both my roomie and her boyfriend read over my new profile to help minimize the impression of crazy I’d be putting out in cyberspace. I changed my screen name too just to really commit to the idea of a new start. Off to the profile readers it went!
I expected some new activity to hit my account but what I got left me feeling like the most popular girl on the site!! Within hours of the new profile going up I had 5 or 6 winks and a few emails. One was even from a guy I had favorited the last go round who didn’t respond to me then but thanks to my new profile, here he was introducing himself and showering me with compliments.
OK so that was the first day. Activity is usually the heaviest the first day you put up a picture. (or in my case, a new picture) But here it is almost 3 weeks later and I’m STILL getting new interest on a daily basis! Color me shocked. At the height of the influx of activity I was talking to 6 different guys. Between last Saturday and this Saturday I’ll have gone out with 3 different men. Three men in seven days. This must be what Paris Hilton feels like. (Minus the burning sensation)
So stay tuned my friends because we have a lot of ground to cover….and a lot of love to make.
I’ve been on so many blind dates I should get a free dog,
LL
Thursday, January 7, 2010
OK this time? It's you.
I've been so busy with my self realizations and the holidays that Crossfit slipped to the back of my mind. Which was the idea, right? Since our chat when he told me I come on too strong I had only heard from him on Christmas Day when he texted me, and then on New Years, I texted him. No big deal, I figured he was done with me and more importantly, I was perfectly fine being done with him.
Cut to the other day. I was going hiking with a (male) friend but having cellphone trouble, so I put a message up on my gchat asking him when I was supposed to pick him up. I walked away from the computer and when I came back, there was a message from Crossfit. Casual conversation at first, and then, the real reason he IM'ed me became clear:
"So, is this Joe (my friend) your new guy?"
I wasn't quite sure how to respond to this. Part of me wanted to immediately reassure him that I still liked him, the other part of me was annoyed with his passive aggressiveness. So to be safe, I settled for the simple, "HA." (*I* knew the friend I had plans with was gay, but Crossfit didn't, which is why I found his comments amusing.) I remained illusive, said I had to go, and left, thinking nothing more of him.
Later that night I was online and he IM'ed me again. Typical man. I barely hear from him for 2 weeks but as soon as there's mention of another guy, he's back with a vengeance. We had friendly conversation and banter, and once again I was the one who ended the conversation. But before I could completely sign off, he snuck this generous offer in:
"If you're not doing anything tonight and want to come over and be naughty, I'd love to have you."
First of all, EW. I HATE when guys talk like we are children. Come be naughty? Gross. I laughed at him. Outwardly. And said not tonight, perhaps another time. Second of all, REALLY dude? You don't talk to me for 2 weeks and you think I'M going to want to come to YOU and hook up? Hmmm...on 2nd thought, based on my previous behavior, don't answer that.
I think nothing more of him and get on with my life, concerning myself with returning to work and playing catch up now that the holidays were over. Monday afternoon he IM's me again. Just a simple, "hey." I return the pleasantry and just as I hit "enter" to post my response, he has already posted this:
"I don't think I want the bf/gf thing with you, but I loooove who you are so I would really like to be friends with you if you want...."
"....and maybe occasionally you can rape me too."
I rubbed my eyes.
Nope, I hadn't imagined this display of patheticness.
He actually had the audacity to tell me he doesn't like me enough to be with me but he'd like to have sex with me occasionally.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Which is exactly what I typed back to him.
Somehow, I don't think I'll be hearing from this "friend" of mine again.
Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love,
LL
Cut to the other day. I was going hiking with a (male) friend but having cellphone trouble, so I put a message up on my gchat asking him when I was supposed to pick him up. I walked away from the computer and when I came back, there was a message from Crossfit. Casual conversation at first, and then, the real reason he IM'ed me became clear:
"So, is this Joe (my friend) your new guy?"
I wasn't quite sure how to respond to this. Part of me wanted to immediately reassure him that I still liked him, the other part of me was annoyed with his passive aggressiveness. So to be safe, I settled for the simple, "HA." (*I* knew the friend I had plans with was gay, but Crossfit didn't, which is why I found his comments amusing.) I remained illusive, said I had to go, and left, thinking nothing more of him.
Later that night I was online and he IM'ed me again. Typical man. I barely hear from him for 2 weeks but as soon as there's mention of another guy, he's back with a vengeance. We had friendly conversation and banter, and once again I was the one who ended the conversation. But before I could completely sign off, he snuck this generous offer in:
"If you're not doing anything tonight and want to come over and be naughty, I'd love to have you."
First of all, EW. I HATE when guys talk like we are children. Come be naughty? Gross. I laughed at him. Outwardly. And said not tonight, perhaps another time. Second of all, REALLY dude? You don't talk to me for 2 weeks and you think I'M going to want to come to YOU and hook up? Hmmm...on 2nd thought, based on my previous behavior, don't answer that.
I think nothing more of him and get on with my life, concerning myself with returning to work and playing catch up now that the holidays were over. Monday afternoon he IM's me again. Just a simple, "hey." I return the pleasantry and just as I hit "enter" to post my response, he has already posted this:
"I don't think I want the bf/gf thing with you, but I loooove who you are so I would really like to be friends with you if you want...."
"....and maybe occasionally you can rape me too."
I rubbed my eyes.
Nope, I hadn't imagined this display of patheticness.
He actually had the audacity to tell me he doesn't like me enough to be with me but he'd like to have sex with me occasionally.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Which is exactly what I typed back to him.
Somehow, I don't think I'll be hearing from this "friend" of mine again.
Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love,
LL
Sunday, January 3, 2010
New Year, New Attitude
OK, so it's 2010. New year, new decade, and a new me that takes all the things I was talking about in 2009 and puts them into practice!
I am a big fan of baby steps. Not as an excuse to keep myself in negative behavior patterns but to make change a bit more stomachable. (is that a word?) I'm the first to admit I am scared of change so anything that keeps me moving forward instead of running back is a positive thing for me.
That being said, I went to a popular dog park/hiking area, Runyan Canyon, the other day in an effort to put some of the new me into practice. Runyan was once voted the best pick up joint in LA. Only in this town would a park be a "scene." I took my dogs, dressed in my cute new Lululemon, and off I went. I had gone to a spin class earlier in the day and was not smelling like the freshest rose in the bouquet so this truly would be a test to see if I could flirt while not looking, or smelling, my best.
Within minutes of entering the park I spied my target. Cute, shirt off, nice body, dark and handsome, just like I like 'em. I immediately looked away as I am prone to do but pep talked myself back into making eye contact. (Well...as much as one can behind oversized sunglasses) I mustered up a weak smile. Hey, baby steps.
He smiled back.
EUREKA! It WORKED! I know, it doesn't seem like much, but for me? This is the first step in a self esteem marathon. I continue on my "hike", a little bit of jaunt to my gait with my new found "hotness" boost.
My little old lady dogs get tired and we turn around. Lo and behold, whom do we see a few short minutes later but my new hiking boyfriend. I am nervous again. Smiling once is one thing, smiling twice is a definite signal. But after a few stern words with myself I decide to smile.
He says hi. (!!!!!!!!)
SUCCESS right?! Well....maybe? Because based on the tone, inflection, and body language that accompanied this simple "hey," one thing becomes perfectly clear:
My new boyfriend is gay.
Dammit.
If horse racing is the sport of kings, then drag racing must be the sport of queens,
LL
I am a big fan of baby steps. Not as an excuse to keep myself in negative behavior patterns but to make change a bit more stomachable. (is that a word?) I'm the first to admit I am scared of change so anything that keeps me moving forward instead of running back is a positive thing for me.
That being said, I went to a popular dog park/hiking area, Runyan Canyon, the other day in an effort to put some of the new me into practice. Runyan was once voted the best pick up joint in LA. Only in this town would a park be a "scene." I took my dogs, dressed in my cute new Lululemon, and off I went. I had gone to a spin class earlier in the day and was not smelling like the freshest rose in the bouquet so this truly would be a test to see if I could flirt while not looking, or smelling, my best.
Within minutes of entering the park I spied my target. Cute, shirt off, nice body, dark and handsome, just like I like 'em. I immediately looked away as I am prone to do but pep talked myself back into making eye contact. (Well...as much as one can behind oversized sunglasses) I mustered up a weak smile. Hey, baby steps.
He smiled back.
EUREKA! It WORKED! I know, it doesn't seem like much, but for me? This is the first step in a self esteem marathon. I continue on my "hike", a little bit of jaunt to my gait with my new found "hotness" boost.
My little old lady dogs get tired and we turn around. Lo and behold, whom do we see a few short minutes later but my new hiking boyfriend. I am nervous again. Smiling once is one thing, smiling twice is a definite signal. But after a few stern words with myself I decide to smile.
He says hi. (!!!!!!!!)
SUCCESS right?! Well....maybe? Because based on the tone, inflection, and body language that accompanied this simple "hey," one thing becomes perfectly clear:
My new boyfriend is gay.
Dammit.
If horse racing is the sport of kings, then drag racing must be the sport of queens,
LL
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