Gucci

I love gay men. As such, it’s important to me that a guy I’m dating is just as in love with them as I am. OK…maybe not QUITE that in love with them because that could create a conflict of interest, but you get what I mean. To weed out those that aren’t enlightened enough to be perfectly comfortable going to a gay bar with me and my boys, I mention this in my profile.

So, a little while ago I received an email from a gentleman with a somewhat douche-y picture of himself that looked SUSPICIOUSLY like a headshot. (I refuse to date actors) Though not so impressed by his photo, I opened the email and it asked when we were going to meet up and go to the Abbey (biggest gay bar in LA) for drinks. OK, when you appeal to the fag hag in me then you’re just playing dirty.

We play email tag for awhile and then I give him my number. One Sunday we’re texting and he comments about me living in the middle of Boystown. I ask if he’s stalking me and he says, “Yes, and that was a very long shower you took yesterday at 3:47pm. I’m sitting outside your window. Hi.” This actually made me laugh out loud which is a rare feat via text message. We continue texting and a few minutes later, he calls me. I’m in the middle of a Law & Order episode so he’s just going to have to wait. 2 seconds later he texts me saying, “Hey, can you ask the busted Honda that just parked in front of me to move? I can’t see your window.” This guy’s sense of humor is winning him MAJOR points.

We finally talk on the phone and he is easy to chat with. Turns out he owns his own fashion business, hence earning him the nickname, Gucci. Said business seems to be going very well and he owns his own house, which is no easy feat in LA. So he’s funny and has money? UPGRADE. I ask him his last name and he calls me out on wanting to google him but regardless, he tells me.

After we hang up I fire up the ol’ Google machine and enter his name. I expect his fashion business to be the first thing to pop up but no, instead it’s the website for the reality show on Bravo “The Millionaire Matchmaker”? Huh?

Oh yes my friends. Turns out this guy was actually featured on the show. I google him again just to make sure I have the right guy and sure enough, it’s him. I find some message board discussing his episode and what a jerk he was. The audience seems torn: half the viewers think he’s a first class douche, the other half think he was just playing a role and that he’s hysterically funny. This amuses me to no end, especially as I watch clips of his “butler” feeding him grapes. For REAL?! I cannot wait to tell the folks back home this story. I text him, “This. Is. Amazing.” And he says, “I thought you’d like that.” Oh I do indeed.

Unfortunately he is off to NYC for his 30th birthday so it will be a bit before I can meet him, but in the meantime, I’ll amuse myself watching Patti, the Matchmaker, talk about what a jerk he is, and watching his session with her 87 year old “life coach.” Seriously, you can’t make this up.

Love lasteth as long as the money endureth.
LL